Arguments and Staplers
by oreoplatzchen
Summary: "He'll get over it." "You gave him a solid black eye to go with his re-broken nose." "Or not." Modern AU where we see what happens when you break your sort-of boyfriend's nose before going home with him for Christmas.
1. Chapter 1

**This is a Modern AU so be warned. Names have been changed to protect the innocent, no wait, they've been changed to make thing more interesting. I plan on this being multiple chapters. Please review with any feedback.**

**I own nothing.**

**Enjoy**

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><p>"So you threw a stapler at him?" Ruff questioned Astrid.<p>

"He pissed me off okay? He was too far away to hit, and it was the first thing I got my hand on. So I chucked it at his head." Astrid rolled her eyes. It wasn't a big deal; she had caused Hiccup more than a few bruises over the years. Still, Ruff had been pestering her for the past hour to relive the incident from earlier in the day.

"I knew he was getting on your nerves, I just didn't think you had it in you." Ruff said with a slightly maniacal smile, incredulous that her roommate's violent streak had reached new heights.

"Ruff, I've beat the shit out of him before. Why wouldn't I toss a stapler at his head?" Astrid challenged. "Can we be done talking about this now?" She whined, wanting to forget the fight.

"No, and that was before you both came to terms with your feelings." She made wide gesture to accompany the broad term of feelings, with mild irk. "You've been less than averagely violent with him since you've been 'talking'." Ruff sat up from her position on the floor where she had been lying on the carpet to look at Astrid.

"You're starting to sound like Fish. Henry will get over it." Astrid shrugged, hoping that was the end of the conversation.

"I don't think he will too quickly." Fishlegs contributed to the conversation as he entered the apartment without knocking.

"Speak of the devil." Astrid mumbled.

Fishlegs continued, "You gave him a solid black eye to go with his re-broken nose." Astrid pulled her knees up to her chest and began rhythmically hitting her head on her knees in frustration. Ruff burst out in raucous laughter.

"Twice! You've broken his nose twice now!" Ruffnut was gasping for air in her uncontrollable fit, rolling on the floor "I can't believe it. Not just once but twice." Astrid groaned and self-directed anger began to set in.

"Astrid, I'd say there's a 80% chance that hitting your head on your knee is only going to make the swelling worse." Fish winced at his distraught friend in sympathy. "And it won't make Hiccup any better."

"Dammit. I left my damn ice packs over there." Astrid was under strict orders to ice her knee every two hours. It was a constant cycle of putting the ice packs in the freezer and taking them out; it was a tedious routine, she loathed.

"I know you spend most of your time over at Hiccup's but, bitch, you live here. So should your shit." Astrid had left multiple things at Hiccup's apartment from earrings and bobby pins to her phone and it wasn't out of the ordinary for him to show up with a bag of her things when he came over to their apartment.

"Shut up, _Rachel_. I can handle my own life okay." Astrid snapped defensively. The apartment's atmosphere quickly became filled with tension.

"Obviously not, _Gwen_." Ruffnut challenged. When the pair began to use on another's first names, a fight was not far behind.

"Both of you cut it out before I call a Family Meeting." Fishlegs said in a calm tone. "I know you're both stressed out but invoking the real names is out of line. . ." Fishlegs continued the lecture as Astrid gave her attention to her buzzing phone instead of Fish's monologue. Henry had texted her. She huffed as she unlocked her phone to read the message.

'I heard yelling and the words Rachel and Gwen. Is it safe to come inside? Or am going to have to go back to the hospital today if I enter?' She rolled her eyes at the tone of his message; she could always hear him saying the things he wrote as she read them.

". . .Do you know how much everyone hates it when we have to have a family meeting for your shenanigans. . ." Fishlegs had continued.

Astrid interrupted. "Henry, get your ass in here and stop eavesdropping." Fish and Ruff turned toward the door in mild surprise to see Hiccup come into the apartment.

"Oh." "My." "God." The trio alternated in shock. Hiccup's face was bruised pretty badly; dark ovals underneath his eyes, swollen nose and a dark swollen area on his cheekbone where the stapler made its initial impact. To top it off there were a few cuts on his face from the metal edge of the stapler's bottom.

"Damn Gwen, you got him real good. That's going to look great in your Christmas photos, Hic. I'm sure Gwen is going to have a great time trying to explain this to your family." Ruff enthused as she tried to snap a photo of his face for Instagram.

"Shit. They already hate me. This isn't going to help." Astrid ran her hands through her hair before pulling out handfuls in frustration.

"I would say you're going to be at least 50% more ostracized by them than before. But that bodes well for the chance of increasing the rest of the group's approval ratings." Fish offered partially cheerful.

"Who said I was still even going to let you come home with me at Christmas?" Hiccup's tone was flat and emotionless. His determined gaze pinned Astrid to her seat.

"You know Fish, I think it's time for you to take me to the movies. Grab your shoes, let's leave them alone. We'll see you guys at the hospital later, Lord knows one of you will end up there by the end of the night."

"Shove it, Rachel!" Astrid yelled as Ruff walked out the door and Fishlegs followed with less dramatic flair.

"Gwen and Rachel, huh?" He raised his eyebrow to her in question. He walked over from where he'd been standing by the door to their apartment and sat down on the foot stool in front of the couch where Astrid was sitting. "I thought you'd both grown out of that. I haven't heard a blow-up like that in months." His expression was chastising with some humor in his eyes.

"Yeah, well with everything piling up for the end of the semester it's a wonder we haven't fought yet. We've had interviews, last minute assignments and now this stupid knee injury. We're just stressed and on edge, typical senior college student behavior." Astrid explained trying to shrug off his attentions.

"On edge, might be an understatement." He huffed. He winced as he neglected to reign in his usually expressive face. Still, he beseeched her with his eyes; his way of asking her to be serious with him.

"Henry, I'm sorry about your nose and cheek and well really your whole face. I didn't mean for all of this to happen. But I honestly don't want to talk about it." She moved to get up and winced in pain, ultimately sitting back down resigned. He didn't comment, but just got up and went to his bag and pulled out her ice packs.

"You know the drill." He told her as he approached. Astrid reluctantly extended her left leg and propped her foot up on the arm of the couch. Hiccup slid one ice pack under her knee and one on top, adjusting the decorative pillow into a support. "You need to be careful of that. It will not heal properly if we don't treat it right." He sat back on the footstool but left his hand on her knee protectively.

"We? I'm still surprised you're talking to me. You should be so pissed at me right now. You should be yelling, I would be yelling. To be honest, I wouldn't even want to see me again if I were you. I broke your nose, and it wasn't exactly an accident this time." She glanced down at her lap avoiding eye contact of out shame.

"Asta." Henry said to her fondly, in a way he only used in the rare moments, when they were by themselves and she let her guard down. He was moving his thumb in soothing circles on her knee, just above the ice packs, distracting her from her anger.

"Don't Henry. There is a difference between taking care of me and being my therapist. I don't need any more doctors in my life telling me how to live. I have a bum knee. It will never heal right. It won't ever function normally, because it never has functioned normally. I love that you love to take care of me and I know there are sometimes I need it. I don't need the medical advice though. If that means we don't work out together and you don't stretch me anymore then that is what we'll do. But we all know I don't take kindly to being ordered around, that doesn't need to come between us."

"You know I'm just trying to help you through this the best way I know how." He removed his hand from Astrid and looked at his feet as if they held the answer to having this conversation.

"Damn it, Haddock. If I could kick right now, I'd kick your ass." Astrid yelled at him. "I'm your friend, not your patient anymore, and you damn well know that."

"Well technically it is where we bonded." He offered looking up at her.

"Hiccup Henry Haddock, you backed me into this conversation stop trying to weasel your way out it now. " She smirked, which was his aim with his comments. Shying away from the yelling that would only exacerbate their problem, she wasn't any less frustrated with him. "Just because we bonded in physical therapy doesn't mean that's why we're friends."

"I'd like to think we're more than friends." Hiccup would have blushed if his face wasn't mottled with bruises. He reached for her hand lacing his finger in hers. "Don't tell me we're not. But you would have never given me the time of day for us to get closer if you hadn't ended up in the clinic where you we're stuck with me." His eyes had softened, losing the anger they held when he first arrived.

"Henry, you're getting off topic. I've apologized and I will take you out to dinner to partially compensate for your face. But you need to promise me that you will lay off when it comes to me medically. If you start diagnosing me and giving me lists of exercises, as you make me feel like an invalid again, I will not hesitate to break something else of yours." She implored him.

"While I make no promises, I will do my best to leave therapy at the clinic. You have full permissions to point it out if I don't. I am sorry for the way I made you feel earlier and in the future I expect you to try to communicate your frustrations with at least enough time to let me dodge." He smirked and he joked with her, both of them knowing she was working on expressing her emotions without yelling or violence.

"Deal. Now, help me up. I need to go change if we're going to eat; it's a bit cold outside for shorts." She took off the ice packs setting them on the table. Hiccup stood up, leaned down to grab her hands and gently pulled her up to stand in front of him. She looked up at him and smiled, trying to remember when he became so handsome.

"Do you need help getting to your bedroom?"

She looked down at her knee as she bent it to test it out. "No, my knee is mostly numb. I should be fine." She shrugged and looked back at him searching his face.

"Then why aren't you moving?" She was only standing a few inches from him, but hadn't made a move to go put on pants.

"Because I want to kiss you and it hurts too much to go on my tiptoes. I thought if I kept looking up at you, you'd figure it out." She put her hand on his chest. Normally, she'd pull him down by his hoodie or neck, but she was wary of injuring him further with her usual force.

"Well, I'm sure that can be arranged." He brushed her bangs off face and cupped the back of her head carefully. He kissed her gently, both of their heads tilted to prevent further injury to Hiccup's nose. She sighed gently as he pulled away. "Now, go get changed if you must. I'm starving."

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><p><strong>an**

**For those who may have been confused:**

**Ruffnut's real name is Rachel. Ruffnut is nickname.**

**Astrid's first name is Gwendolyn. Astrid's middle name is Astrid.**

**I don't know if Fishleg's real name is Fishleg's or not, we will see where the story takes me.**

**And Henry Hiccup Haddock. If you missed that. Really only Astrid calls him Henry.**

**Please review, I love feedback negative, positive, questionably relevant.**


	2. Chapter 2

**I am so sorry this update took two months. I just wasn't sure where the story was going and I had to wait until the characters took me somewhere. **

**I truly hope you all enjoy. I appreciated all of the follow/favorites and REVIEWS immensely. I thrive on the reviews to let me know if the story is enjoyed.**

**Thank you all!**

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><p>"So were you serious earlier?" Astrid questioned as they were waiting to be seated at the restaurant.<p>

"I said a lot of things earlier." Mentally noting the different subjects that he may or may not have been serious about throughout the busy day.

"About Christmas." She said looking at the door instead of Hiccup's face.

"Don't think you're getting out of Christmas with my family that easily." He laughed comfortably. "They truly don't hate you as much as you think. They just don't know how to handle someone who is a little…" He pauses trying to find the right term for Astrid's particular traits that contrasted his family's.

"Abrasive." Kendrick interrupted as he entered the conversation, offering his hand to Hiccup for a handshake, and then pulling him in for a hug.

"I was going to say shy." He said with a laugh, surprised at Astrid's brother's appearance.

"Nice save." Astrid said to Hiccup, and then turned to her brother to hug him. "You're late." She admonished her brother, mostly in jest.

"It's good to see you too, Gwen." He commented, playfully knocking his sister off-balance.

"You didn't tell me he was coming." Hiccup smirked at Astrid, excited to see his old friend.

"That's alright she didn't tell me she was bringing you either."

"Am I not allowed to have dinner with my two favorite men?" She inquired with innocence.

"Most people are, just unusual for you to surprise anyone. Not that I'm complaining I've missed seeing this guy. He hardly comes around anymore now that he's your boyfriend." Kendrick had thrown his arm around Hiccup reveling in the presence of the couple.

"I'm not her boyfriend and you know it. You'd been trying to get us to be friends for years before we had. Now you have to push us to date. Give it a rest." Hiccup said with mock exasperation.

"So the broken nose isn't from fighting off her other suitors then?" Kendrick joked as the waitress finally sat them at their table. Hiccup laughed and shook his head. "Okay, then at least tell me what happened it looks pretty gnarly."

"I threw a stapler at his face this morning." Astrid stated matter-of-factly. She turned to Hiccup sliding her hand on his thigh to get his attention. "Henry, will you go get me a drink from the bar?"

"Sure thing." He told her with a smile. "Want anything Kendrick?" Kendrick was trying to settle on his reaction to his sister's blunt statement. He face was vacillating between hysteria and approval, but he managed to shake his head in a negative to Hiccup. With a shrug Hiccup walked away from the table.

"Gwen, how could you do that to him? I mean if he actually did something to deserve it I don't think you would allow him in your presence let alone, acting as if nothing happened only this morning."

"It was an accident. I mean I didn't throw the stapler by accident, but I wasn't thinking about what I was grabbing. He wasn't listening to me and ordering me to stay still and take my meds. You know how-"

"Wait, are you sick?" He interrupted looking up from his menu with concern in his eyes.

"No, I twisted my knee again. They think I've re-torn my meniscus. Maybe surgery this time, but PT for now to see if it will heal on its own. Same as usual." She rolled her eyes at the whole situation with her knees. Both of her knees had given her trouble since her freshman year in high school. They were constantly acting up, but Astrid gave her best effort to ignoring the irritating pain in her day to day life.

"Gwen. You need to take better care of yourself. You're always in the doctor's office." He wasn't wrong. Since starting college she'd sprained her ankle, been hospitalized for the pneumonia, had a tonsillectomy, and developed killer acid reflux.

"Yeah, yeah, lecture about my health later when I can ignore you more easily. Back to the point, don't bring up his face." She saw Henry returning to the table. "We haven't really talked about it and I'd prefer you not to be involved when we do, it's complicated. But feel free to badger us about anything else you want." She offered instead.

Hiccup sat back down at the table with two beers, setting one down in front of Kendrick and one for himself and a whiskey sour for Astrid. She smiled at him in thanks.

"I know you said you didn't want anything, but I figured that was mostly because you were having trouble talking." Hiccup joked. "So how long are you in town for?"

"Just for the night, I trained an office downtown all day today. I leave out on a late flight tonight."

And so dinner progress with a few more drinks and a lot of catching up. Kendrick told them all about his recent move and new job training office staffs on how to use their new management softwares. Astrid filled him in on the joys finishing up her degree in Speech Pathology and looking at where to go for Graduate School. Hiccup regaled him with anecdotes from working in the clinic as he finished his Doctorate of Physical Therapy.

"So you, both graduate in May?" Kendrick he asked with a full mouth.

"No, I have another year left. But even so she'll be in grad school by then." He laughed and looked at Astrid adoringly. "So a graduation every May for the next three years for us provided everything goes according to plan."

"I'll be sure to clear my calendar." Kendrick mused with a smirk.

"Anything I should clear my calendar for?" He looked confused. "Unless you and Heather aren't together anymore? I'd figured you'd have proposed by now though." Hiccup nearly choked on his bite of food at the audacity of the question. Kendrick was used to his sister's brash nature and took this in stride.

"Well you have no room to talk; the two of you have been dancing around each other for ages. One day you'll just come to visit and tell me you eloped. At least I'll give you warning." He contended

Hiccup figured if he kept eating he could avoid contributing the uncomfortable topic of conversation. Kendrick had tried all through high school to get his friend and his sister together, but neither one of them ever tolerated his efforts. Sure, they hung out in the same crowds and saw each other often; they hadn't been close, especially when he was two years ahead of her in school there wasn't much reason for it. He graduated and left for college, she didn't see him again until she was in physical therapy her freshman year of college and he was logging observation hours at her clinic.

Now that they'd been inseparable for three years, Kendrick was up to old tricks trying to get the pair to date. He was unaware of the recent romantic turn of their relationship, as we're most people. Astrid and Hiccup wanted to keep the occasional kiss, and gesture private until they felt comfortable letting others in on the secret.

"No quick retort for that one Gwen?" Kendrick challenged. A Hofferson never turned down a challenge.

"I don't want to break two noses in one day." She eyed Kendrick. "I'm going to walk away and let you two to chat a moment." Astrid left the table and headed for the restroom.

"Really Kendrick? You brought up marriage?! For goodness sake, man she can't even bring herself to call me her boyfriend." Hiccup ran his fingers through his hair as if that would make him feel more in control of the situation.

"So you're not denying that now?" Kendrick quirked his eyebrow and began to pry for information.

"I am not denying that I have very strong feelings for your sister, however she's avoiding commitment." Hiccup's frustration rolled off him palpable waves.

"Well, that's Gwen alright. Avoidance of acknowledging feelings at all costs. Getting her to commit to something that she could change her mind about is nearly impossible. I'm not sure how we ever got her to pick a major." His brows were scrunched up, as if he'd never figure out the puzzle that was his sister.

"But the point is we're getting somewhere; somewhere I'm quite happy with, despite the setback that was our fight this morning." He said gesturing to his face.

"You'll figure it out. You always have. Still I expect you to be my brother-in-law in the next few years." Kendrick maintained.

"We'll see, but you have to marry Heather first." Hiccup replied with a hearty smile.

"Ah, yes things I agree with. We need more girls in the family." Astrid commented as she rejoined the table with a smile.

After dessert, Kendrick had to leave and they parted way promising to call when he arrived at his next location and that they would see each other at graduation in May.

"Am I taking you to my apartment or yours?" Hiccup questioned as they got in his car to leave.

"Is yours fine? I don't want to see Ruff." She hesitated as if she would be imposing by coming over.

"Still mad at her for name calling?"

"No, I just don't want to talk to her about us. I would rather us talk about us." She said staring at her lap as he drove.

"Oh?" He spared her a quick look while stopped at the red light.

"Don't act surprised you know I can only handle so many emotions at once and putting them into words is so exhausting."

"Bottling things up isn't good for you or my face. We'll get back; I'll make us cocoa and we can talk about it." He placed his right hand on top of hers.

Henry brought two mugs of cocoa from his kitchen into the living room. He set one in front Astrid along with two ice packs and he sat down at the other end of the sofa with his.

"Now, we're having this conversation until we're done. But I think you should go first." He blew across the top of his mug and sipped his cocoa lightly. Astrid looked him in the eye and set down her mug.

"You know it's hard for me to accept help and deal with injuries. I can cope. I've been doing it for years, and I know you're doing everything because you want to and not because you have to or because I asked. Still I feel guilty. I am fully capable of using crutches and getting things on my own. I truly appreciate all you do for me and it makes my life easier, but it throws off the balance of the relationship. It's not like I can repay that kind of skill, you don't have use for my speech pathology skills. And I know there are other things I do that you can't and I know that relationships are not point for point."

She took a moment to sip her cocoa and figure out where else she was going with her monologue. Henry moved to talk, but Astrid gestured for him to wait.

"I'm not done. Sometimes you're over helpful. This morning, I just wanted to hangout. If I had wanted to be berated by a slew of questions about my health I could call my mom or my doctor. I know it's because you care, but I'm an adult. I can handle myself. You know I don't like the pain pills, don't make me take them. I know when it's time to ice my knee again; I need a reminder like I need a hole in my foot. So please listen to me when I ask you to chill out and just watch Jeopardy with me.

I know it's no excuse to throw heavy objects at your face. I can't apologize for that enough. But you weren't paying attention to me—wow that sounds petty—you weren't listening. There wasn't another way to get your attention because you weren't letting me stand up. So I threw the stapler and screamed a slew of awful things at you and hobbled out of your apartment. I completely overreacted in an in appropriate way. You don't know how sorry I am for it.

Still, I feel like you don't hear me sometimes. You're listening, but then nothing changes in your actions after the fact."

She took a deep breath and sighed. She held her cocoa with both hands took a long sip and looked up at Henry expectantly.

"So is your diatribe over?" She nodded. "Okay. I accept your apology. I know telling me all of that is difficult for you and I appreciate it. I'm sorry that I have been overbearing and I haven't been listening to you. I just don't want you to have to have surgery and I want you to feel better. I know I don't know best, but sometimes you are a little headstrong and you need help and won't ask for it. I know you won't so I help anyways. Let me know when I am over stepping my bounds, I promise to work on it.

But Asta, you need to be more careful. I know you don't like it, but with that knee you do have some limits. So when you twist it to where you can't walk because you didn't tape it up while you were dancing is a concern to me. Your injury could have been much worse. We both need to work on how we handle our reactions. It's not a crime for you to be angry with me. Nor is it one for me to care about you.

There is nothing I do for you that I expect repayment for and you know that. Everything I do, it because I want to do it for you. I want to be there, to love and care for you. You make it hard sometimes, stubbornly independent. Accepting help doesn't make you any less strong. If I can take particularly good care of you because I'm medically inclined then let me help you. I will try not to doctor or order you around, I know how annoy that gets. But you can't tell me that massaging and stretching your leg doesn't feel good."

She smiled at him, her features relaxing. Henry paused in his speech to scoot closer to her pulling her legs onto his lap. He looked at her for permission and she nodded leaning back. Taking the ice packs off her knee he began to stimulate the muscles supporting her knee.

"I like doing this because you enjoy it. Sure, it certainly aids your healing, but it makes you happy. Your smile lights up my life. I don't plan on going anywhere anytime soon either."

"God, how are you so good at this?" Her eyes were shut as she focused on staying relaxed.

"Well, I spend a lot of time thinking about you. I know how identify and process my emotions. Fortunately, I have the ability to put them into words without difficulty—" Hiccup babbled facetiously.

"No, I meant my leg. You're better than the other therapists." Astrid interrupted.

"My leg pain is a bit different from yours, but I've been on your end of these massages and I know how to make it better." He said with a wink. "Usually the therapists are afraid to cause pain. It's not supposed to be the best feeling, but never painful. Our relationship allows this to be easier, you'll let me know if it hurts and I can touch you without hesitation."

"That makes sense." She said nodding, her eyes still closed. "I want this to work. I know you want to talk about us and you're impatient about it. I want you to take your girlfriend home for Christmas. Not a secret anymore, but I want to wait to tell everyone until after my exams are over this week. I'm not sure I can handle the attention until I'm done studying." She lifted her legs off of his lap and scooted herself right to his side and held his hands. "Are you going to say something?"

He looked at her searching her face. "What changed?"

"You know you're asking for me to give a lot of feelings tonight." She rolled her eyes at him. "When you were talking I knew you cared. You're not going anywhere; you're not going to leave me. I needed to feel confident, to trust our relationship. This is going to work. We're not going to ruin our friendship, just alter it into something better."

"Wow, college really has fried your brain if you couldn't realize that sooner." Henry joked as he kissed her forehead. "I'm sure it will be so much easier explaining my broken nose to my family with you being my girlfriend. They may be more sympathetic if you have your crutches though." He spoke with an ease she hadn't seen in him in a while. He put his arm around her, and tilted her chin up with his finger. "They are going to love you, or at least learn to." He jested as he kissed her deeply as if to express all of his love for her in that one gesture.


End file.
